1: project introductions and bad decisions
ft. overviews of current activities, an extract, and a drawing
GREETINGS, FRIENDS. Say hello to Issue 1 of The Vampire Shift Roster. There will be many more issues to come, as none of my characters are exemplary models of healthy mentally-balanced living, because why on earth would I want to write about that?
Ba-dum-tssss. Insert post-punchline drum noise here. I just googled what that’s called because I’m Not A Musician and it’s called a RIMSHOT? Come on. The filthy jokes write themselves.
Okay enough procrastination because this is bizarrely nervewracking to write, onto Actual Content (man, social media’s wrecked my relationship with the word ‘content’) which will broadly consist of: 1) a super-rough overview of my projects and where I’m at; 2) an extract from the main novel’s first draft; 3) a drawing I did of a scene in the extract.
But first, let me do some writing of ACCESS ALL AREAS’ Draft 2 so I have something better to tell you guys than ‘I’ve literally done nothing of Draft 2 since Issue 0 from a couple days ago’! Holy shit this newsletter could be good for productivity as well as a stellar method of procrastination. Gimme a sec.
Okay I’m back. Nice. Okay here we go for real:
1. a super-rough overview of my projects and where I’m at
THE VAMPIRE SHIFT is the name of a novel I’m working on. Here is one of the many pitches I’ve written for it:
An Internet-dwelling musician-turned-newly-minted-vampire teams up with a failed vampire hunter to pursue indie rock stardom via a narratively irresistible and totally fake on-screen romance — which works excellently, until it’s threatened by the appearance of an amnesiac vampire virtuoso, not to mention something much worse: real feelings.
And now here is a summary of it I wrote for a Tumblr game:
I mean, this version does miss the vital detail that they are vampires, but I’m pretty enamoured with it nonetheless.
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS:
is it YA? what even is YA (young adult) fiction anymore. I’ll go with no, on the grounds that the three main characters are like, 22(?), 24(?) and [literal centuries] years old. And also (yes I did just google a definition so I could better answer this) this book definitely isn’t aimed at 12-18-year-olds. It’s aimed at one (1) 28-year-old, i.e. me.
that’s it, that’s the only FAQ I have. ayyyy.
WHERE AM I AT WITH THE VAMPIRE SHIFT? AND WHY AM I WRITING ITS NAME IN CAPITALS?
Apparently it’s some kind of standard practice to format unpublished works’ titles in uppercase, and use italics for published works. Nice.
Now, where am I with it? Well. Hmm.
WHAT I HAVE:
a very rough storyline ft. premise (as you’ve seen above), core conflict, climactic resolution, and end state.
a bunch of ideas of events/scenes/etc. that I want to include
like, a third?? of the important worldbuilding? I’ve got a solid idea of how my vampires work and there’s gonna be magic and that’s it
a somewhat-developed trio of main characters and a couple side characters
20,000 words of Draft 0, which mostly consists of me writing whatever scenes I feel like and is EXTREMELY rough
a Pinterest moodboard where you can see one of the many titles I’ve had for this WIP. I still like the sound of ALL THE OCEANS. I’ll use it as an in-universe name for a Vampire Shift (the band, not the book) album/song/something. Yeah the book title is also the name of the band that the book is about.
WHAT I DON’T HAVE:
literally like any important plot details other than what’s described above? like I’m def not a hardcore planner (tried it, didn’t like it) but I’m also not a blind pantser and I would ideally like to nail down some more details before FULLY DIVING into any more of Draft 0. theoretically. and I’m not talking small details, I mean things like ‘how does the band come together’ and ‘how do Sasha and Rae know each other’ and ‘am I keeping the amnesia thing’ and important shit like that. I could go in blind and just fumble around and work it out while writing, which is a valid strategy, but I don’t really want to do that on as chunk a project as a novel.
a final decision on how to spell cum/come, which will become relevant in THE VAMPIRE SHIFT and is already relevant in …
ACCESS ALL AREAS, which is a short story featuring the core cast of THE VAMPIRE SHIFT and which takes place in the same universe, after the novel’s events. Or maybe at some midpoint. Haven’t fully decided yet.
I decided to write a short story to test out my writing process on something short and less massive than a literal fucking novel lmao (shoutout to my partner for this excellent idea which I definitely wasn’t irrationally sceptical about when it was first pitched oh noooooo).
It has been super helpful and fun. I’ve learnt that my drafting process (which is ‘write write write it doesn’t have to be good at all just aim to have fun and then polish it later’) seems robust but did lead me to write 39,000 words of a short story that was imagined as being, like, 5,000 words max. LOL. And I even had an outline for this! I mean, it was a rough outline. A quite rough outline.
And that’s not the only thing about it that’s rough It’s a porno. That’s what ACCESS ALL AREAS is. That’s why I’m quite pleased with the title, because it’s a music/gig reference and also ripe for innuendo. I could call it erotica or romance or something else but, I dunno. ‘Porno’ is funnier and I dislike the term ‘erotica’ for some reason, and I’m still not sure what, in the book world, ‘romance’ (as in the genre) really … means LOL.
WHERE AM I AT WITH THE PORNO? I’ve finished writing and editing the first draft, and today (in the midst of writing this update) I wrote enough of the opening (ayyyy) (sorry) scene to get to where Draft 1 starts. What does this mean omg this is terribly phrased, let me try again: I’m fairly pleased with Draft 1, but I decided it needed a different opening scene. So today I finished writing the new opening scene, and next time I sit down to work on Draft 2, I can start rewriting stuff in Draft 1, as opposed to writing completely new stuff.
WHY AM I WRITING A PORNO? I firmly believe this question requires no answer, but for some reason I’m justifying myself anyway with: because a good idea for it jumped into my mind pretty fully-formed (and this does NOT happen often let me tell you) and also I’m pretty sure I write best when I’m having fun.
WILL I SHARE THE PORNO? Yeah probs
2. an extract from the main novel’s first draft
He looked heart-wrenchingly good. My eyes drank in every detail and then my heart was pounding and I was grateful as hell that he couldn’t hear it, but if it kept going like this, maybe that would no longer be the case.
Don’t, I thought to myself.
I’d become really good at ignoring the sensible voices in my head.
I adjusted the strap of my guitar case on my shoulder. ‘Any plans for the rest of the day?’
That was still in the realm of innocuous chat. That was still defensible.
‘No, not really,’ said Killian. I thought I saw something flicker in his eyes, but I couldn’t be sure, as I was already looking away, an automatic reflex like recoiling when you touch a hot stove.
And then I touched the stove again.
‘Do you want to come back to my place?’
I heard the words leave my mouth in the same way that you see a match falling into a pool of gasoline, but much more pathetic.
Killian met my eyes and this time I didn’t look away, this time I saw him blink once, the tiniest hint of a frown on his face. Saw his jaw tighten, heard — underneath my own thundering pulse — his own heartbeat going at a relief-inducing misery-loves-company pace that was definitively faster than normal.
The second of pause before his response was interminable, and I fought the urge to break it. And then he smiled, the same offensively beautiful smile that had taken my breath away the first time I’d seen it.
‘Thanks for the offer,’ he said, his voice light and pleasant and the light in his eyes anything but. ‘But honestly, I’d rather fellate a claymore.’
I couldn’t help but snort a laugh, my lips involuntarily quirking into a smile. I was on autopilot now, backing away from the roiling chasm of mortification opening up beneath my ribcage. ‘Nice. I respect that. Hey, quick question, where was this way with words when we were writing lyrics?’
The smile faded as he sighed, looking down at me with an impressive amount of disdain. ‘Bye, Sasha.’
Without waiting for my reply, he turned and left, angling toward the train station. I tortured myself for a moment, watching his long-legged loping gait eat up the pavement, and then I started walking in the opposite direction, towards home, resisting every screaming urge I had to look back.
I tried not to listen to his footsteps receding into the distance, and then plugged myself into earphones, because even his graceful, predatory stealth, honed by a hunter’s upbringing, was no match for vampire hearing, never mind that of a vampire ex-girlfriend.
The thought made me shudder, and I walked faster, trying not to grit my teeth, jamming my hands in my pockets and resisting the urge to claw fingernail-red crescents into my palms.
Jesus fucking Christ, why?
I was nearing my flat, trying to come up with a turn of phrase to describe my nausea that could be bent into a lyric, forced into a hook that I could belt at the top of my lungs in my bedroom, into a mic, in front of a crowd — when I heard it. Footsteps behind me, cutting through the thrash of pop music.
I slowed, pulled out one earbud, and half-turned, willing my heart slower and failing utterly when I saw him a few metres away, surprisingly close.
He closed the distance between us in a few quick strides, lurching to a halt, apparently having just sprinted, going by the rise and fall of his chest that I hated myself for noticing.
‘Hey,’ he said, a syllable that was more of a gasp than anything else. He dragged a hand through his hair, and I carefully arranged my features into my best attempt at sardonic nonchalance.
‘Hey,’ I said.
Don’t say it, don’t say it —
‘I’m sorry,’ he said, and I blinked in surprise, raising an eyebrow.
‘For what I said,’ he continued. ‘That was …’ he trailed off, and I let a smirk twist my mouth as I watched him visibly scramble for words.
Watched his eyes dart up and down my body.
‘Yeah?’ I prompted. ‘What was it, exactly?’
He swallowed. ‘A low shot that I no longer stand by, that I could’ve apologised for over text, but —’
‘But you wanted to see me at mine?’
The words blurted out before I could claw them back, and in a thousand different ways, I hoped to god I wasn’t wrong.
Killian met my eyes and the barest hint of a smile appeared on his lips, a smirk that looked like defeat as he nodded.
3. a drawing I did of a scene in the extract
This image file is called KSclaymore.jpg. So if you were wondering which scene … yeah, that one :)
OH MY GOD we made it to the end of Issue 1! Holy shit! That felt good to write. Did you enjoy reading it? Did you give every single one of these words the attention it deserves or did you skim, like some kind of traitor / milk that’s shit for baking? Let me know!! (I’m so good at not alienating an audience, aren’t I. Winning popularity points since 1994, that’s me.)
Oh my god. Hitting publish now before I can second-guess everything. Thanks for reading/looking! Have a fucking amazing weekend/week/whatever! GOODBYE